


Destiny

by Mrpointyhorns



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angels are big, Angels are kind of Dark matter, M/M, Science
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-17
Updated: 2016-08-20
Packaged: 2018-07-15 14:18:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7225831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mrpointyhorns/pseuds/Mrpointyhorns
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While on a case, Castiel see a picture of his true form, Dean is overcome.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The Professor sits at desk, between them, looking skeptical at best, and unimpressed. Dean stares him down trying to be earnest, but probably coming across as annoyed. It is minutes that they spend staring off. The Professor, Ed Collins, is an older man, but the only sign is his stalk white hair. He had some wrinkles at the corners of his eyes and mouth, but they seem to come from smiling, not from aging. He is an expert in New World Mythologies and might be the only person that can give them some light on Thunderbirds. A few days ago, Dean saw a potential case in New Hampshire. He and Sam decided to look into it. It was some normalcy that wasn’t angel or demon tablets. It was going back to roots, hunting things, saving people. Kevin was probably glad to get rid of them.

Castiel joined them some where in New Jersey. He looks good. Better than he did in Oklahoma. Sam sent Castiel with Dean to talk to the Professor at the community college, he didn’t say what he was going to do, but Dean assumes it’s sulking in front the computer while he researches online. As far as Dean’s concerned, as long as he doesn’t have to see Sam like that, then he is happy questioning the Professor with Castiel. The angel is studying the classroom with something like disinterest and complete fascination at the same time.

All Dean sees is another classroom, a place that he never fit in and was glad to see behind him. It makes him queasy remembering being called to answer a question, but never having enough time in one place for him to learn the answers. This Ed Collins is staring at him with the same look as many of his teachers. It says: this kid isn’t worth it. This kid is beyond saving. And: this kid is wasting my time.

It usually results in Dean staring blankly back and mirroring the sentiment in the thoughts. Dean is staring like that now, waiting out the Professor, and becoming increasingly more withdrawn.

“Do they resemble Roc?” Castiel asks without notice of the stare off, or perhaps he did. He is studying a poster on the wall of Einstein, his wild, crazy hair and a quote about that being creative is more important than knowledge.

Professor Collins grumbles as he stands up. “Come on, boys.” He leads them behind the desk to an office to the side of the classroom. It is decidedly messier, like the cleaning crew has been told to empty the trash, but not do anything else. There are books stacked about in all parts of the room, from text books to literature. There are shelves too, but those contain knick-knacks and awards, not books. The desk here is littered with papers and exams, folders and assignments. He has photos of kids and grandkids scattered about. “Wait here; I’ll see what I can dig up.”

He leaves them in the office shutting the door with a click. Dean settles into a chair on the far side of the desk, he has to move the three sets of coats from the chair to the metal cabinet beside of the desk, in order to do so. He does without much disgust and settles into his seat, it is just like he’s waiting for his Dad to come pick him up after being suspended.

Castiel is looking at a new poster, hanging on the door. It is a picture of a galaxy, with the word Destiny underneath, and a quote that Dean can’t read from his position. Castiel is studying the poster intently and he strokes over the blue lights spilling from the center of the galaxy, then back over the purple.

He looks up towards Dean a small hint of a smile on his mouth, one that is a fraction of the ones they shared in purgatory. “This is a good picture of me.”

“That is a galaxy, Cas.”

“I am aware that it is a galaxy. But I am in the picture nonetheless, you see,” Castiel strokes over the blue and purple lights. Dean stands up to get a better look at the poster. The galaxy is a huge spiral galaxy, with the center glowing hot and bright. Spilling out of the center are streams of blue and purple light. It’s bright and huge and beautiful.

“This is you?” Dean asks looking to Cas, the one he is familiar with.

“Well not exactly, but it is the best picture I’ve seen. I suspect a radio telescope was used. They would need to use telescopes that is much more advanced to get the entire picture.”

Dean looks at the poster again; the light is spread out over the galaxy and spills out in different direction. This is just the part of Castiel that can be seen by the telescopes. He shutters thinking about how this is just a portion of what Pamela saw, and no wonder she went blind. Castiel is big! Huge! Terrifying. His knees tremble and he stumbles back into his seat clenching at his shoulder where part of THAT, touched him, burned him.

“You are shaking?” Castiel asks.

Dean turns his eyes up looking at Castiel, the one he knows. He forgets that he is not a human. That he has a true form. He is an angel. That is powerful. How can he forget? He is bigger than he ever imagined. He just stares at Castiel with his big wide pupils and cannot comprehend how the enormity that is inside.

“Be not afraid.” Castiel steps closer, into his space and down close to him.

Dean bows his head, hiding his eyes, exposing the back of his neck. “How can you say that?”

“You do not need to be afraid. Dean, I am your soldier.” He feels Castiel’s fingers close on the back of his neck. They are warm and soothing. Dean thinks they must be warm because his entire being is crammed into a human who is smaller than Dean. And he isn’t afraid. He doesn’t feel that way. He feels calmed. He is safe.

Castiel steps aside as Professor Collins returns, and Dean looks back at the poster as the door is shut once again. The quote says, _it is not in the stars that hold our destiny, but in ourselves_. And it maybe the best inspirational poster ever, because that is Castiel, team free-will. 


	2. Chapter 2

They return to cabin labeled Þunor at an empty cabin colony that runs only in the summer. It is an eighth of a mile off the highway, down a steep hill. No one should be able to see them using the cabin from the highway.

 

It has stove heating and four bedrooms, with beds, lacking bedding, but better that many vacant places they have stayed in the past. The water works, and so does the back up electricity, which means the lights in the main living room and kitchen work, but not in the bedrooms. That’s alright; they have lamps and sleeping bags in the Impala that will do. At least the refrigerator runs which Dean stocked with beers as soon as he could.

 

 “Thunderbirds are supposed to benevolent they don’t feed on humans, though sometimes they create families with them,” Dean says unloading the burger takeaways that he stopped to get on the way back.

 

“He said that one time they fought against humans, but that the humans had attacked them with the intention of enslaving them,” Castiel stands close to the table. He pays no attention to Dean and Sam separating their meals or digging in. He just keeps talking. “The location proves to be a problem too. These legends came from the Northwest, in the Great Plains and the Southwest, but not in the Northeast.”

 

“It wouldn’t be the first time that we have encountered a creature outside its normal range,” Sam says using his fork to scoop lettuce instead of stab it. “The vic died from electrocution, in the middle of a hiking trail, on a clear day.”

 

Dean shakes his head. “What have I told you about running?”

 

“Seriously, Dean.”

 

“Yeah, sorry, Professor Collins was a jerk.” Dean quickly takes a huge bit of his burger to silence the conversation. Sam takes the hint and focuses on his meal. Dean watches Castiel as he walks around the room and out into the living room, there are three bedrooms on the other side of the living room and a third tucked to the side of the kitchen.

 

Dean doesn’t like it when Castiel wanders away, they are not in purgatory anymore, but old fears do not go away.

 

* * *

 

There are so many pictures of galaxies using x-rays, radio wave and visible light. Dean was just curious, he wanted to know more about the poster, but hours later he has scroll through pages and pages of pictures. Were these all pictures of angels? Was there a way to know which angel? Was it something else? Dean tried to read a little about the pictures and why some galaxies produced the lights. The answers provided were wrong of course, Cas said the picture was of him, not the remains of light that a black hole was consuming, not two galaxies colliding. So, even though there was information about them, none of them spoke about angels, why would they. The pictures were too recent for lore to be associated with them, and none of the images would have been seen in the past. People couldn’t see that wavelength of light with their own eyes, it was only with radio telescopes that they were able to capture the image and turn it into something people could see. Knowing what happened to Pamela, the special cameras were probably necess…

 

“Dean!”

 

Shit! That was Sam. Dean slams Sam’s laptop shut and pushes it away from him, to the other side of the table. He tries to act casual, but he thinks Sam probably saw him move the laptop away. Sam glares at Dean as he stomps over. “I told you not to mess with my stuff.”

 

“I wasn’t!” Dean holds up his hands. He can’t meet Sam’s eyes. He looks at Sam’s right ear.

 

“Great, you were looking at porn weren’t you?” Sam grumbles setting down a few paper groceries bags in his seat. “I thought we had gone over this.”

 

It would have been better if Dean was looking at porn. He didn’t delete his history. So Sam’s going to see what he was looking at soon enough. He doesn’t want Sam to think he’s suddenly taken an interest in science and nerd things. He hasn’t! But, he’ll let Sam thinking that, because he doesn’t know how to explain to Sam that he was looking a pictures of Cas and other angels. “What’s in the bag?”

 

“Just a few things, since we have to stay around here for a while to figure out this thunderbird thing.” Sam looks at him suspiciously. “Do you…are you…” Sam flushes.

 

Dean stares at him not understanding for a while, and then, Oh! Oh… which he says, “Oh! Oh…” to. Then, he blushes as well and takes the chance to leave. “I’m going to bed.”

 


	3. Chapter 3

Sam didn’t bring up the pictures, and Dean was fine with that. It was a few days later. He just finished getting ready for the day, and wandered into the kitchen to get coffee. It was still mostly dark out, with just a bit of grey in the air to hint at morning. Sam was sitting at the table working on the computer. Up all night? No, there was a hint of rested in Sam’s eyes. He probably just got up too, the coffee was mid-brew, and so that was an indication. He opened the fridge out of habit, he wasn’t going to cook anything yet, but he didn’t have anything to do until the coffee was ready.

“Rebecca…she’s so young there,” Castiel says.

“Geez Cas!” Dean jumps nearly a foot, and Castiel isn’t even near him. He appeared seated at the table, with Sam.

Sam does not seem startled, so Dean feels embarrassed about his reaction and goes to stick his head in the cabinet of cutlery for a while. He hears Sam say, “Rebecca?”

“My sister.”

“I know she is your sister, but this is a picture of Centaurus A,” Sam says.

“That is correct. She is there in the picture. See. The gas is covering a good portion, but using the radio light you can see her better.”

Dean peaks up from the cabinet looking back at Castiel and Sam. His brother is staring at Castiel, and Castiel returns the gaze with ease. Sam licks his lips before talking. “Can you slow down a minute? Are you saying that this photo is partly of your sister?”

“Yes. We often visited different parts of the universe, sometimes for purposes like pulling the righteous man from hell, but for other reasons as well. She was there about 11.5 million years ago to witness the supernovas,” Castiel explains. “She wasn’t much for traveling, but she did have an interest in supernovas for a while, and visited many of them. She grew out of that.”

Sam flicks his gaze up at Dean and then back to Castiel. “Which galaxy did you visit?”

“Many of them. As you know, it was my garrison’s job to enter hell and extract the righteous man. We all were resigned to our task, but we all took different approaches to it. Anna would design exercises and mock extractions to help prepare us. Uriel spent a lot of time training alone to keep his skills fresh. We all learned how to pass the time.”

“What did you do?” Sam asks.

“Sometimes I would prepare with Anna, other times I would train with Uriel, but most of the time I would find a good spot in the universe, and watch. We knew our task, but it took billions of years for us to know which galaxy, which planet, which person, it wasn’t our task to learn these, others were assigned to those tasks. So first I scanned the galaxies, watching, seeing some that looked promising and when this galaxy was revealed to us I watched the galaxy trying to find the correct star system; then the planet, then the species. So on and so forth. I didn’t mind waiting. I watched so much.”

Sam stares at Castiel and then back down to the computer. He swallows and looks up, his eyes a little teary. “You waited all of that time, and then we mucked it all up.”

Castiel tilts his head. “I disagree. Not on the waiting, that I did, but I disagree on the muck.”

The cabinet door clatters against the cabinet Dean’s arms fall limp to his side. He that feeling of awe and insignificant, again. Sam clearly feels the same way. Castiel tilts his head curiously.

Dean clears this throat. “Who wants bacon? I have a craving for bacon.” It is silent again. Castiel doesn’t answer because he doesn’t partake in eating. Sam stares down at the images on his laptop. The silence hangs in the room for a while. It goes from being uncomfortable to alright and then to uncomfortable again. Dean doesn’t say anything as he grabs his keys and heads to the door.

He heads for the Impala wishing he had a coat, but doesn’t turn back. He drives up the hill and towards town. His thoughts come crashing down on him when a man runs onto the road looking horrible. His hair is singed, and what is left of his clothes is melted into his skin. He collapses in the road, and it’s all Dean can do to slam his brakes on and turn the wheel. It is too fast, and the Impala skids down the hill and only stops from rolling because it hits a tree. The glass on the passenger side of the car shatters, and Dean covers his eyes with his arms.

From under his arms he sees a flash of light just as he feels the roll of thunder shake his car, and the sound is so loud his eyes bleed. It happens a second time before Dean is unconscious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just keep writing these. I don't think it's that much longer. But who knows.


	4. Chapter 4

“…over here…”

Light whooshes over him.

“There’s the Impala…”

Light whooshes over him again, faster, but comes back and remains solid. He turns his face away.

“Dean!” … “I can’t open get the door open.”

“It’s melted closed…”

“I see that, thanks Cas. CAS!”

He flinches away as he hears the metal crunch around him. Then strong hands reach for him pull him from the wrecked car. He moans. 

“Hey Cas be careful with him.”

“I have him.”

“What happened?”

“His heart stopped.”

“He just moaned…”

“Let me explain further. His heart was stopped by the force of being struck by lightening.”

“Lightening!”

“Not directly. But it was close. Fortunately, it restarted as he was struck again.”

“That’s…impossible.”

“He also suffered trauma when his car slid off the road and into the tree.”

“Yes…well that happens.”

“Can I restore him now?”

“Why wait?”

“In case you want more information on his condition.”

“Restore away, we’ll ask questions later.”

“He may not remember…”

“Restore him Cas.”

 

* * *

 

 

Sam didn’t bring up the pictures, and Dean was fine with that. He almost forgot all about the entire incident because a few days had already passed. Sam might bring it up after the case, but not now. Dean used a towel to scrub his hair drive and went out into the bedroom that he was using in the cabin. He tossed the towel onto the bed next to his sleeping bag. Then, he went out into the cabin. Sam was sitting at the table tapping a pencil on a pad of paper and looking at his computer, but Dean knew him well enough. He wasn’t seeing the computer. He was thinking. Both the tapping and the frown gave that away.

“Make any coffee?”

“Dean!” Sam jumps up from the table and scrambles over to the counter pouring Dean a cup and adding sugar.

“What’s this?” Dean asks. Taking the offered cup and drinking carefully.

“Uh coffee…how are you feeling?” Sam asks.

Dean looks at him suspiciously. “Okay what’s going on?”

“You were hit by lightening…twice, and crashed the impala,” Sam explains looking curious and concerned at once. “Do you remember?”

“The impala?!” Dean runs to the enclosed porch and looks out to see the impala relaxed into the stone path outside. The area is covered in a thick fog, but Dean can see the impala well enough. She is fine. Dean walks back into the cabin. “You got me.”

“Dean…” Sam states.

“I repaired the baby this morning,” Castiel states. Dean jumps and whirls about spilling coffee on his hand and wrist. Dean takes the cup with his other hand and sucks his thumb. The coffee is hot and sticky. “I wasn’t able to last night. You were my main concern. I am still feeling…sluggish after purgatory…”

“Uh…” Dean says. Castiel frowns at the mention of purgatory or maybe his sluggish feelings. “You can do that…repair a car?”

“I have watched you over the years…I have an understanding of how, so it was not too difficult to apply it.”

Dean’s jaw drops. He feels a squirming sensation in his stomach. He can't imagine someone else working on his car, but at the same time he thinks about Castiel watching him take care of her, paying attention when Dean didn’t know. He feels hot and cold about all of it.

“He did a good job, just…” Sam touches two fingers on his forehead. “You know but to the car.”

Dean’s eyes widen and his mouth snaps shut. He feels so disoriented right then and confused all at once. That was not what he thought Castiel meant, but wow…“I’ll take a look at her later.”

“I was just telling Dean that he was struck by lightening,” Sam says after a long awkward period of silence. Dean moves over to top off his coffee since it was spilled. “He doesn’t remember.”

“I said that might happen. It may have happened anyway, but some of the events may have been intact. I couldn’t rebuild Dean’s memory of the events so he was unable to store them,” Castiel states he stares intensely at Dean’s coffee cup.

Dean looks down at the cup curiously and flushes bright. The cup is a large black cup with the picture of a galaxy and Dean though not the expert at galaxies knows this is the one that is the picture of Castiel. Dean’s eyes dart to Sam. Sam doesn’t seem to get it at first, but then he smirks and puffs up his chest. Dean not wanting to feel like Sam got the better of him takes an exaggerated sip of his coffee. Sam rolled his eyes at the reaction, but Castiel pouted. “What?”

“I’m upside down.”

“What?” Dean asks looking at the photo.

“I suppose it doesn’t matter which way you place the galaxy in a photo, but I’m upside down.” Castiel points to a purple light near the bottom of the cup. “That is near my head.”

“What do you mean near your head?” Sam asks curiously. Dean looks at the photo trying to turn his head to get a correct view of it. In his opinion the purple and blue parts that are Castiel don’t look any different from one side or the other.

“My head isn’t in the photo. I mean it is in the photo, but the cameras that took this picture weren’t capable of capturing my head in the photo. Most of what is in the photo is just grace.”

“Are angel’s more than just light?” Sam asks.

“It depends.” Castiel looks down at his vessel and then up at Sam. “But not just in a vessel. Angels can take form. I had to take form when I entered hell and rescued Dean. And that is what is called our true forms. True forms are concentrated and they do not hold up well in the vastness of space-time. We use our true forms or vessels in Heaven.”

“So does this form have a head?” Sam points to the cup.

“Well, it does and does not. The head is not flesh and bones. It is just the part of me that commands the rest of me. The part that houses thoughts and feelings.”

Dean rubs a finger over the “head” on the cup.

“Oh…” Sam looks like he barely understands.

“One day, I hope that you and Dean will be able to witness both. I believe you will be given that ability, just like many of the people my father found favor in.”

Sam preens a little about that, but Dean just rolls his eyes. “A lot of favor amounted to very little if you ask me.”

Castiel and Sam both look upset about this so Dean stalks to the table and sits down. He looks over at the books and newspapers. “Someone went missing!?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I have a theory that the Impala has a life force. Since it just takes belief in something to make it alive. The Supernatural books and Dean's treatment of the Impala is enough in my opinion and the belief would be good thoughts about the car therefore the car would be good. So, I'm not sure if Castiel could fix a car, but he can heal the Impala.
> 
> I also have a theory that Meg and Tom were Special Children before. They were the winners in their own time, like Jake. They just never had anyone like Sam or Dean around to complete the process or start it?


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wings! Watch!

Sam insisted that he go to talk to the police alone. He kept saying things like you were struck by lightening. And it’s just the police. Castiel offered to go in Dean’s place, Sam’s response may have hurt Castiel’s feelings. Castiel had disappeared.

On top of that Sam had taken the impala, it was their only car. Dean might have forced the issues, Castiel had healed him, but eventually he decided it was better to give in than hear Sam nag and complain for the rest of the case. 

Anyway, Sam had left his laptop. Dean grabs it almost as soon as Sam leaves and goes into the other room. It is lit by the natural daylight, with the fog and the trees, it is kind of gray in the room. But Dean crawls on the bed and lies back against the wall. He sets the coffee cup on the table beside it. He props the laptop up. Then, he navigates away from the pages about Thunderbird, and Roc. He opens a new tab and starts in on Asian beauties, but then moves to devil threesomes and then to bisexual porn. He is settling into a rhythm and taking his time, because this is partially about getting back at Sam. So he wants to take his time and do it right. Run the battery dry.

_Don’t be afraid._

Dean gasps and moves his hands faster turning his head away. His eyes fall on the picture on the coffee mug. “Cas…” He hisses. “Watch…watch…” He groans his toes curling already. “Watch this. Do you see this?” Twists his hips up and moves one hand lower. Finger brushing softly. “Mm…” His finger is dry, but he pushes it a little inside anyway. Just for the feeling of it. Just to feel it. “Mm…watch!” He hears a flutter of giant wings.

He freezes up. Both hands, his eyes slamming shut. He tucks his head down away. 

Minutes crawl by.

But then…nothing

It was just the sounds of the porn video next to him. He wasn’t praying, so Castiel shouldn’t have heard him. Unless he was standing in the room, invisible, but he wouldn’t do that. Not again….not after…

Dean relaxes and opens his eyes the room is empty. He looks at the coffee mug, feeling disappointed. He forces his eyes to the porn on the laptop. He pulls his finger out and methodically finishes into his hand. He shuts the laptop. Not feeling at all satisfied. He lies back against the wall for a while.

After about five or ten minutes he starts pushes away the thoughts. Picks up the coffee mug and heads back to the kitchen. He’ll shower quickly and move on. He stops dead in the kitchen.

In the screen door is a young woman, maybe about 19 or 20. He darts a look down at his sweats. He had managed to tuck himself back in before leaving the bedroom, but the evidence of what he was doing is still there. He looks up when he hears the door bang shut and then the one leading out of the porch.

He leaps after her not even pausing to grab a weapon. Which damn it he should know better! It would not have helped because as soon as he is outside he hears the loud sound of giant wings followed shortly blinding light. He doesn’t even hear the thunder, before he vision darkens.

**Author's Note:**

> See this image for what I had in my head
> 
> http://www.nasa.gov/sites/default/files/pia18461-full.jpg


End file.
